Postal Malarkey

You may be familiar with the postman's motto: "Neither rain, nor snow, nor sleet nor gloom of night will keep me from my appointed rounds." Well, I can tell you that it is a load of baloney. Granted, we've had more snow than I can ever remember having in the lowlands, but we haven't had our mail delivered in days.

Enumclaw - it's some nasty doody

The other day on the news, they were reporting on the combination of snow and strong winds in Enumclaw and at the end of the report the newsman said, "that is some nasty duty." I doubt that he read that off the teleprompter; he must have been ad-libbing and didn't realize what that sounded like. Sad thing is that he has no idea how right he was to call the Claw, "Nasty Doody."

Speaking of the Claw, I am now going to shamelessly promote my t-shirt designs inspired by my distaste of Enumclaw here

Fun and danger in the snow!

I still can't get over how much snow we've had. It makes Stacey and I feel giddy. Stacey also goes into nesting mode, so she has been cooking and baking up a storm. I haven't eaten this good in a long time. I know what you are thinking, but I have been assured it is the snow and Stacey is not pregnant. So Stacey and I decided to go sledding today on the hill below our house. It was loads of fun, and it was fortunate that we were on the hill at that time. There were a bunch of kids that were also sledding and playing in the snow, but then I heard a small voice calling for help. Stacey and I tried to figure out where the voice was coming from when I spotted a hand waving frantically. It was our elderly neighbor and she had fallen outside on her deck. Stacey raced up the stairs leading to our street, while I called my brother who was at the house. I also flagged down two other neighbors who were snowshoeing and they headed to her place as well. I continued talking to her until Stacey got there, then sprinted up the hill myself. I first attempted to climb the hill - in the snow it doesn't look that steep, but considering I am not a mountain goat, my attempt failed miserably. Well, long story short, we got her off the deck and into the house and I called 911. The medics checked her out and decided she didn't need to go in, but Stacey and I stayed with her for the afternoon and took care of her and her dog. What an adrenaline rush. I guess that makes us heroes, eh? Seriously though, if we hadn't heard her, she could have died of hypothermia. The lesson of the day is that snow can be really fun, but can be very dangerous as well, so be safe and stay warm.

This is stacey sledding on an old snowboard.

Snowmen of Seattle

It's crazy who you see smoking these days!

This snowman was in front of the flying fish place at Pike Place Market. The eyes are real fish eyes and I think the mouth looks like a slice of salmon. Sushi anyone?

It's not just a commute, it's an adventure!

So after hearing the weathermen cry, "Snow!" so many times over the years, I was hesitant to believe that the prediction of snow would actually come to fruition. It did. In fact, it dumped in West Seattle. This place is to' up! Despite the lovely storm, I decided I would still try to make it in to work. I really didn't want to use up any vacation/sick time because of a snow day. Plus, I really enjoy walking through downtown in the snow, so I hiked up to Admiral to catch a bus. Little did I know how big of a mistake that was. Basically, the abridged version is the first bus got stuck so I hiked down the hill to Alki, waited for a bus for a long time, walked to another stop, waited more, got a bus that dropped us off at the bridge, waited some more, watched a full bus go by us without stopping, walked to another stop, finally got a bus downtown, got off at Westlake and hiked up Olive/Howell to finally reach Met Park. The whole trip took over 2.5 hrs. Since I only live a little over 8 miles away, I averaged about 3.2 mph. I could have made the trip on foot faster, although I probably would have froze to death in the process.

This is a picture down on Alki. We ended up getting, I say, about 4 inches of snow. I'm glad I don't have to go back to work tomorrow because the commute is going to be awful. On my way home, I found out that all of the buses that had gone to West Seattle, got stuck there so it took quite a while to find a bus home and I had to walk the last mile or so.

It's a snow day

We didn't think it would be prudent to drive down to Puyallup today because of the snow and ice. On the news, it said that the West Seattle bridge was downright treacherous, so we are staying close to home today. Mark, Stacey and I took a walk down to Alki. Just walking was dangerous enough - I ended up crossing the street on my knees and going down the stairs to the beach on my tuchas - safety before dignity. Speaking of undignified - Stacey took her hat off and put it on Mark while we were watching a seal or seal lion (not sure which) in the Sound.

Cute Shoes

OK - I have no idea what possessed me to get these shoes, but you gotta admit they are hot. I blame Nikki - I haven't come up with a logical explanation for laying the blame on her, but I just know that somehow this is all of her fault. They look great, however, after about 5 minutes of wearing them, my feet start to complain...LOUDLY. I got them at DSW - the greatest shoe store in the world. Nikki also got a fierce-looking pair of heels. In fact, she got the ultimate compliment yesterday when one of the checkers at Met Market, who obviously must be gay, commented on how great her shoes were. It wasn't fair though because I had my hot shoes, but they were in the car because there was no way I could've handled walking around the store in them. I didn't want to be left out, so I told him that I had cute shoes too, they just weren't currently on my feet. Is it sad that I have a need for validation from a gay man on how cute my shoes are? What is happening to me?!!

Mini Vaca

Entiendo español, pero no entiendo español del borracho

So I was waiting for my bus this evening when a highly intoxicated Mexican fellow stumbled over to me and started speaking to me in Spanish. Although I haven't used my Spanish much since moving to Seattle 7 years ago, most of the time I can pretty much understand what someone is saying. Despite the slur, I can even usually get the gist of the conversation from someone with a thick Puerto Rican or Cuban accent. However, the one accent that totally stymies me is "Drunk Spanish." It's even worse than "I forgot to put in my dentures today Spanish." "No Dentures Spanish" is difficult, but not impossible to understand, and the guy I know who speaks it doesn't reek of cheap beer and wine. Basically, all I got out of his alcohol impaired rambling speech was that he was from Mexico, had two kids in Oaxaca and two kids in California (don't ask me why he told me that) and that he had no papers (no duh - can you say, "fishing for a greencard?"). When my bus arrives I say a farewell, only to have him follow me onto the bus and sit his drunk butt down next to me. I finally am able to get through to him that I have no money and unless he has the cash to pay the fare to West Seattle, he better get his tuchas off at the next stop. Lesson learned: Next time someone starts speaking to me in Drunk Spanish, pass myself off as a Greek. OK - that's all for now; gotta go learn me some Greek.

He's Alive!

OK - after writing the previous post, I ended up buying the DVD to Made of Honor starring, of course, a certain Mr. Patrick Dempsey. Today, while checking out a new liquidation store, I saw this (pictured below) and just had to have it. It's so cheesy, it's hilarious. Have you ever seen a head of hair like that on a doll before? The doll (or action figure?) is based off of Dempsey's character in the movie, Enchanted.

I guess it's safe to say that, although he may not be at the very top of my list, Patrick Dempsey is alive and well, and has the best head of hair in Hollywood.

P.D. is dead to me

No - I'm not talking about P Diddy; P.D. stands for Patrick Dempsey. Don't get me wrong - I still think he is a very beautiful man and I love that he plays a doctor on TV (although I am no longer the Grey's Anatomy fan I used to be since they have put the focus on sex instead of medical traumas, but that's another story). It's just that Dempsey has fallen from the top of my "list," and has been replaced by Mr. Hugh Jackman. Here are the reasons why:

Not only is he a talented actor, but he sings. The man has a brilliant voice and is probably one of a handful of gorgeous straight men to star in musicals.



He dances



He's got a sense of humor and can be funny while singing and dancing. Plus, he looks great in a tux.



He's charming and a gentleman. OK, the next video is showing the chivalry of one of his characters (Leopold) who obviously is not real, but his dad once related a story about his chivalry at the tender age of 5 or 6 years old when he was running a race and his first "girlfriend" fell and he stopped to help her up. Anyway, it may not be real, but a girl can pretend, eh?



He looks good without a shirt. He's quite fit. He's in good enough shape to kick tuchas, but since he's a gentleman, he wouldn't unless absolutely necessary (or when playing wolverine).

And, although I could go on and on for quite a bit more, I will finish with he can ride a horse.

I know many a girl who is all excited about him being crowned People Magazine's Sexiest Man of the Year, and I admittedly did buy the periodical, however I was much more entertained by the December '08 issue of Cowboys and Indians. I highly recommend checking it out.

It's a quintessential moment for rock, paper, scissors, lizard, Spock!

You're out to dinner with your best buds and no one remembers whose turn it is to pick up the bill. Being the gracious persons you all are, everyone is offering to pick up the tab? How do you decide who pays? You could use the old standard, "Rock, Paper, Scissors," but when using that technique with people you know well, you will end up in a tie about 80% of the time. You need a higher number of possible outcomes, so try "Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard Spock." This is not a new idea, but was made instantly popular by a show called The Big Bang Theory.



This is the perfect way to settle a dispute or just have fun. It's the new game that is sweeping the nation. Try it - you'll like it. However, if you pick Spock everytime, you are a total geek.

As some of you may know, I have a t-shirt and gifts shop on Cafepress, and if you can't use your blog to shamelessly promote your stuff, then what good is it, eh? So, if you wanna, you can check out shirts and stuff with the rules to Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock.
http://www.cafepress.com/innermango/2639217

Minor Celebrity Sighting

Today on my home from work, I had a few minutes to kill before catching my bus, so I popped into the downtown Barnes & Noble and caught sight of local pseudo-celebrity, Blayne Walsh, purchasing the latest issue of Vogue. It was obvious since returning to the Emerald City that he has resumed his unhealthy tanning habit, as he is a very dark, unnatural orange-brown color. You gotta lay off the fake-and-bake, Blayne, before you get a melanoma. Tanning is cancerlicious, which is not a good thing.

The Stupidity of Halloween

Not only is Halloween pagan and evil and creepy, but the lemmings that celebrate it, considering it harmless fun are just plain morons. Even with the economic nose-dive we are in, the National Retail Federation estimates U.S. consumers will scare up nearly $5.8 billion to celebrate this evil holiday. That's a per-person average spending of $66.54, nearly 3% more than last year's average. Why would people waste so much money on something so stupid and gross?

Switched at Birth?

My "dad" is from the Philippines. I, in no way, look like a Filipina; not even a half Filipina. When friends meet my "dad," I invariably get asked, "That's your dad...? Are you sure?" I'm the palest half Filipina girl I know, except for a couple of Albinos, but they don't really count. I'm not pasty white, but for supposedly being half Asian/Polynesian, I don't think so. Speaking of pasty white, there's my alleged mom - the poster child for pasty whiteness. Along with the marshmallow-colored skin, she has blond hair and blue eyes and I neither look like her or act like her. I really don't even understand her. She repeatedly complains that I can't read her mind or finish her thoughts like my "brother" can. I guess she doesn't realize that I consider that a compliment. Then there's the suspicious circumstances of my birth. When Bev (the alleged mother) went into hard labor, my "dad" decided that would be a good time to go to the cafeteria for a snack. Bev, being the great patient she always is, was being so aggressive and confrontational that they medicated her until she was unconscious. I don't remember the event at all, so as far as I am concerned, until I see a maternity test, I maintain that they brought home the wrong baby.

Jessica Simpson's Movie

Jessica Simpson's latest movie has been a major hit in Russia, and will be opening in Bulgaria next. But why hasn't this movie (which sounds like a rip-off of Private Benjamin) opened here in the US - the country in which it was filmed, where the dialogue doesn't have to be subtitled or dubbed? Word has it, her acting is so awful that the powers-that-be are hesitant to release the movie in the States, or anywhere else where English is the primarily spoken. Apparently, the eye-candy factor of Miss Simpson is not high enough to excuse her lack of talent. Considering how much stupid drivel is released on a weekly basis, this must be really bad.

Fashion Show @ Amber

"Live 4 Life Fashion, Rue, and The Industry came together for what turned out to be an absolutely spectacular fashion show. Project Runways Blaine Walsh was in attendance along with hundreds of Seattle's most beautiful socialites none of which left unsatisfied."


The above is what was written about the event that Nikki and I went to. I know what you are thinking: "A fashion show? Why was Tiff at a fashion show?!!! Why were Nikki and Tiff hobnobbing with Seattle's beautiful socialites?" I know. It's weird. Let me explain. I think I've made somewhat of a transformation since moving to Seattle. It's been slow, but, partially because of Nikki's persistence, I am learning to act more like, well, a girl. Mind you, I am still the tough tomboy who loves playing football, but I've learned it's OK to look and act like a girl. Included in my transformation is my newly developed obsession with all things Project Runway. Nikki got me into it last season (not this recently ended season, but the one before it - the one with "so fierce" Christian Siriano). The challenges they put the contestants through are sometimes amazing, Heidi Klum is hilarious and Tim Gunn is a fashion genius. OK - I digress. So the reason we went to the show at Seattle's trendiest bar was because of Blayne Walsh. He was one of the aspiring designers from the most current season. In case you didn't know, this tanning addict contestant lives in West Seattle and had a design piece in the show. Blayne certainly wasn't one of the most talented designers of the season, but he seemed to be a nice fellow and pretty funny. And his designs were almost always memorable, although usually not in a good way. One piece was described by Michael Kors as "it looks like it's pooping fabric." I didn't get a real close look at his piece at the show, but I can definitely say it was not my style.



So, anyway, Nikki and I decided to go to the show, just for kicks. The stuff they sent down the runway wasn't anything I'd ever wear, but it was still fun and one of the models was pretty hot. Granted, the likelihood of him being gay is pretty high, but that doesn't stop me from admiring his looks. I think the highlight of the night was watching the two guys sitting at the table next to us. I am sure that they came to the bar having no idea about the fashion show and they definitely felt out of their element. The two of them made up the majority of straight guys in the restaurant. It was also really funny when one of the guys was trying to be 'gentlemenly' (yes, I made that word up) and get the server's attention for Nikki and the waitress took it the wrong way when he tapped her on the arm and called him an a-hole. The poor guy was embarrassed, but it was still pretty funny. Some photographer chick came up and wanted to take our picture, but fortunately I was with no-nonsense Nikki, who bluntly told the woman, "No!" Gotta love it! Overall, it was a very interesting and fun night. FYI - Blayne is the guy in blue in the pic above.

PS - I know there are spelling and grammar errors in the quote at the top of this post, and even though I feel compelled to fix them, I'm not, since it's not right to change anything in a quote.

The Evils of Halloween & Excessive Drinking

The Mortgage Meltdown

This ice sculpture is called "Main Street Meltdown," and was created to commemorate the 79th anniversary of Black Tuesday, however I think it's also an appropriate symbol for today's economy, which, by the way, is Nikki's fault - ask her and she will tell you why.






The furniture outside of this Fannie Mae building is part of a protest from homeowners facing default on their mortgage loans. What a system we live in, eh? Just another sign of the times. Nikki - is that your love seat? J/K

Daylight Savings Can Be Hazardous To Your Health

I am soooo glad we get to move our clocks back this coming Sunday. I hate, no loath Daylight Savings Time. Being forced to give up an hour just really ticks me off. Apparently, I'm not the only one who is averse to DST. According to an article in the Seattle PI, Swedish researchers (those crazy Swedes) have found that turning the clock back one hour is good for your heart, so conversely, moving it forward can have adverse effects. Our friendly Swedish scientists looked over the data from 20 years of records and discovered that the incidence of heart attacks increased in the week after starting daylight savings, whereas the number dipped the Monday after setting clocks back. I knew I felt justified in hating DST. Just to be fair, though, the article mentioned that some uptight American researchers found that your chances of getting hit by a car increase with the end of DST, but, personally, I'm willing to take my chances for an extra hour of sleep.

http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/health/1500ap_med_time_change_heart_attacks.html